You know that feeling – you realize you’ve made a mistake, maybe hurt someone’s heart, and you feel sorry. You regret having made the mistake. You wish you could rewind and get a do-over.
Maybe you end up beating yourself up or self-talking your way into justifying why it had to happen that way or why they deserve what they got. Either way, it’s hard to just let it go and move on without hardening your heart.
But hardening the heart seals the hurt inside, which can lead to illness. But you can’t go on feeling bad about yourself. So what do you do?
Mistakes, remorse and forgiveness are natural parts of being human. Once we recognize we’ve made a mistake or hurt someone, it’s natural to feel sorrow and regret. The heart naturally wants to make things “right” usually by asking for forgiveness or making up for the “wrong” actions somehow.
Many religions and spiritual teachings suggest Repentance – feeling sorrow and regret for mistakes. I always had a negative connotation with that word – I felt like I was supposed to admit how horrible I was and subject myself to eternal pain and rejection. A hardened heart might be a better option.
So, I can feel bad inside or I can harden my heart. Therein lies a trap!
Here’s the key: Sorrow and regret are only initial parts of this concept. We’re not meant to get stuck there. Key to healing is the RETURN that comes after we feel the regret. The feeling of regret brings us awareness.
Here’s the trap: There’s a subtle twist that can happen in the regret phase. It turns the sorry feeling inward, so that we begin to make our selves wrong instead of acknowledging the mistake as wrong.
The inner dialog, though it may be subconscious, usually goes like this: “I’m so sorry. I’ve really messed up. I’m so bad for what I’ve done. I deserve to grovel and wallow in this pain. I’m not worthy of forgiveness or love.”
Kind of hard to move into the RETURN to Divine Love from this downward spiral into deeper and deeper unworthiness, right?
Here’s how to avoid that pitfall: First, KNOW that making mistakes is part of the human journey. We humans are created to make mistakes. Mistakes cannot make us wrong, when God has created us to make the mistakes.
The important thing is to receive the gifts available to us through the mistake. The sorrow opens the heart to a deeper place that truly wants to return to love. In the sorrow, acknowledge the place that wants to return to Love and turn to that Love with gratitude!
The inner dialog might then sound something like this: “I’m so sorry. I feel like I’ve messed up. I feel bad for what I’ve done. I ask for Your forgiveness, and I thank You for helping me to recognize my mistakes. Please turn my heart toward You and fill my heart with Your Love, so that I can learn Your truth and never make this mistake again.”
Do you notice the difference? The first dialog says “I am bad…” The second says “I feel bad…” To make yourself wrong is a downward spiral. To feel sorrow opens a place inside that deeply wants love. So when you open the place that wants love – this is the plan – turn that place to receive love. The love is what heals your heart and returns you to wholeness.
I have an online program that teaches a powerful healing meditation practice called the Heart-Centered Meditation. This practice can help you to wash away the pain, avoid the pitfalls and return your heart to live in Divine Love.
I’d like to share it with you today, my birthday, for the super bargain deal of only $7. To get the special price, use coupon code HAPPYBIRTHDAY.
Click here to get instant access to this online program.
The Heart-Centered Meditation online program comes with an eBook, Webinar & 2 Guided Meditations you can use daily to bring healing to your heart that will spread to all of your life.
I do hope you will enjoy this for your Labor Day weekend.
Join me in celebrating my mother’s labor and my birth, and have a beautiful weekend!
Live and Love Joyfully!
Debra
P.S. Don’t forget the coupon code of
HAPPYBIRTHDAY to get the
Heart-Centered Meditation online program for
only $7! Just click here for instant access.
